Tag Archives: childhood

“Kazaçok”, we called it…

thinking of mom again
my routinely composed beloved

she is too beautiful not to be so
my in-love dad would say…
a no harm-intended frame of mind
the most vicious version of it though
has been ruling over women
in a tragically fallen Turkey today

dancing the Kozachok
on the beach-road of Erdek late one night

my brother
back in the bungalow
deep asleep

i on the other hand
back then an utterly free essence
in eager applauses
too big for my yet-to-grow hands
exalting to my heart’s content
the no-curfew-months of all summers
ever so ecstatic of my standing ovation

the sea


the back-then spectacular sea

with all of her well-aged
head over the heel for her-trees intact
was too admiring mom’s graceful frame
keeping the slightest breeze
in a grip ever so tight
with not even one ripple in sight
lest mom’s step would miss

not even one ripple in sight?

oh this is nothing!
i surely did exaggerate
adorably manipulate
reality a little bit
way back when

mom seemed to me
as if she was caught inside a trawl
willingly laughingly uninhibitedly
living only by being

i cannot remember another moment
when she had let herself just be…

© hülya n. yılmaz, 3.14.2017


Filed under Reflections

…the dance of my life…

POSTED.image for ölümü düşünüyorum

[Photo Courtesy: My daughter. My grandson is over a year old now. Out of my respect for his parents’ private sphere, any of his photos I post are either old or don’t show him in full.]






the dance of my life


the story used to form fast on the tip of my parents’ tongues

extended family ever so ready to join in the retelling

a natural dancer with a spry passion apparently i was

with or imagined music – it would not matter

full attention of whoever did routinely gather

ample laughter a loving audience were always alive

not even a single beat without me had any chance to thrive


in later years when that early joy came back from the dead once or twice

i submitted to the music’s magic however in full disguise

both joys then ceased to be for as long as i can remember

becoming an adult was no easy feat after all…

birthdays rushed one after another at their racing speed


i am now graced with a delightful grand baby

he, too, may dance on his own one day…maybe

if not, the loss will be great and only mine

for he once poured into me a dance of the divine


Filed under Poetry