The last time I checked – toward the end of the July 22-week, there were 647 followers of my blog site. As of Friday, July 26: 62. Just late spring of this year (May 24, 2013, to be exact), I had expressed my thanks with a post announcing my surprise of having 540 readers. In other words: the high number was not a game of my imagination! My first thought on this head-spinning disappearance of a substantial number of my readers was: what have I done? There, of course, is no answer to this question. Only those readers now no longer with me would know. This fact didn’t stop me from seeking an answer, though, as to what I may have done to cause their dis-interest in my writing. Hence, my efforts – in no comparison whatsoever – to find a formula among a circle of writers with advice to give, posthumously or otherwise.
My first visit was to Emily Dickinson for her oft-cited thoughts on writing: “Saying nothing sometimes says the most.” Had I been saying too much? And of nothing, at that?
Then, Daphne du Maurier came to my mind for a quote I have seen recently: “Writers should be read, but neither seen nor heard.”
I wondered…had Dame du Maurier been living in our times, would she have erased her profile picture…? Or refused to have her voice taped under any and all circumstances…? (And, I shall keep wondering about whether I even understood her statement at her level of intent…)
I found myself paying particular attention to Anne Lamott for her following lines of words, perhaps because she lives in our times:
“Writing and reading decrease our sense of isolation. They deepen and widen and expand our sense of life: they feed the soul. When writers make us shake our heads with the exactness of their prose and their truths, and even make us laugh about ourselves or life, our buoyancy is restored. We are given a shot at dancing with, or at least clapping along with, the absurdity of life, instead of being squashed by it over and over again. It’s like singing on a boat during a terrible storm at sea. You can’t stop the raging storm, but singing can change the hearts and spirits of the people who are together on that ship (From: Bird by Bird).”
Have my posts been too much about “the absurdity of life” with which I have been ‘squashing’ you all “by it over and over again”?
The words below by Paulo Coelho left me with a sad reminder of the newly lifted warmth of my 585 readers:
“[…] I’m sincerely moved by the beautiful words of wisdom that my readers share with me. In a way the Internet is enabling the writer to no longer be alone, to debate ideas, to share information and to get inspired by the readers (From an interview).”
Then the critic Cyril Connolly had my attention, as he was known for his idiosyncratic opinions on writing: “Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self (From: GoodReads).” I believed I had been writing without any separation of one from the other…
My mind took me also to Jack Kerouac, the unconventional author who is said to have claimed the following regarding the written word: “Write in recollection and amazement for yourself (From: GoodReads).”
While I have been creating work in “recollection” for ‘myself,’ I have not been posting any as long as I can now think back. Regards the “amazement for one’s self, I have no such expectations nor do I hold on to any hopes when I, as a writer, am concerned.
Leaving on my imaginary time and space capsule, I finally arrive at the door of Horace to whom the following wisdom is attributed: “Often you must turn your stylus to erase, if you hope to write anything worth a second reading (From: Satires). ” There are numerous reasons as to why I can’t erase or modify my ‘stylus’ as of yet…
Knowing my reality against the backlash of all advices I compiled here from an intimate gathering of authors, I decide to resort to a reassuring thought by Henry Miller:
“Writing is its own reward (From: GoodReads).”
Regardless of how many or how few of us – readers and writers alike – may gather on my blog site from this time on forth, I will, thus, continue to write and do so in the same manner as I have done for all this time: from the heart. I can only hope some of you will still be here for me to share the passion I have for writing to such extent.