In the words I quote below, Dejan Stojanovic – a contemporary poet, writer and essayist, conceptualizes a human quality I lack when one were to take into consideration only my reaction to tragic life events:
“To hide feelings when you are near crying is the secret of dignity.”
It would be a dramatic understatement for me to even claim that my case ever involved a mere “near crying” state. Tears run in abundance. Whenever the suffering and pain of others have my attention – regardless of my proximity to them. Then, there is also the matter of my own suffering. While I handle pain rather well, the emotional hurt I experience in the face of heart-wrenching occurrences is too stubborn to let me hold back the salty drops. But, I am not apologizing. For I hold the conviction that the release of one of our inborn emotions cannot serve as a basis to measure dignity. Would you agree? I would love to hear from you either way while I continue to hope that our psyches will grant us with a far less rigid definition of this human characteristic.
In the meantime, I leave you with my emotion-laden words. They came to me at a time when I was in a most vulnerable state of being, facing a rash and harsh demand for a loss to life. As you will probably also conclude, the following lines evidence that my self-judgment as I have started my post with is not severe after all:
ripped off of its cage
hot iron presses upon the open heart
defeated not yet deceased
the body continues to beat
(hülya n. yılmaz, 5.20.2015)
I don’t see that holding back crying is dignity. How about crying with dignity or it being a part of a dignified expression? I agree with your comment above. But hey, to each his own.
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Yes, dear Paulette, “to each his own” indeed and that’s why we are on this platform, connecting to each other through reactions and responses. I am in full agreement with your thought on this matter and very much appreciate your visit here.
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I can’t imagine crying to be a lack of dignity. Weeping to me even shows much respect if one is crying with someone who has much sorrow. I have cried with friends and it is relief/release and a bonding experience.
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Exactly! Loss of composure? Maybe. But lack of dignity? That claim goes too far. I very much appreciate your reaction and the fact that you are sharing it with me, ladysighs. .
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Marvelous dear, Hulya! I love it! Demetrios
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Thank you for your visit and kind comment, dear Dimitri. How wonderful for me to know you have liked my reflections!
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