. . . lack of dignity in crying?

In the words I quote below, Dejan Stojanovic – a contemporary poet, writer and essayist, conceptualizes a human quality I lack when one were to take into consideration only my reaction to tragic life events:

“To hide feelings when you are near crying is the secret of dignity.”

It would be a dramatic understatement for me to even claim that my case ever involved a mere “near crying” state. Tears run in abundance. Whenever the suffering and pain of others have my attention – regardless of my proximity to them. Then, there is also the matter of my own suffering. While I handle pain rather well, the emotional hurt I experience in the face of heart-wrenching occurrences is too stubborn to let me hold back the salty drops. But, I am not apologizing. For I hold the conviction that the release of one of our inborn emotions cannot serve as a basis to measure dignity. Would you agree? I would love to hear from you either way while I continue to hope that our psyches will grant us with a far less rigid definition of this human characteristic.

In the meantime, I leave you with my emotion-laden words. They came to me at a time when I was in a most vulnerable state of being, facing a rash and harsh demand for a loss to life. As you will probably also conclude, the following lines evidence that my self-judgment as I have started my post with is not severe after all:

ripped off of its cage

hot iron presses upon the open heart

defeated not yet deceased

the body continues to beat

(hülya n. yılmaz, 5.20.2015)


Filed under Reflections

6 responses to “. . . lack of dignity in crying?

  1. I don’t see that holding back crying is dignity. How about crying with dignity or it being a part of a dignified expression? I agree with your comment above. But hey, to each his own.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, dear Paulette, “to each his own” indeed and that’s why we are on this platform, connecting to each other through reactions and responses. I am in full agreement with your thought on this matter and very much appreciate your visit here.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I can’t imagine crying to be a lack of dignity. Weeping to me even shows much respect if one is crying with someone who has much sorrow. I have cried with friends and it is relief/release and a bonding experience.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Anonymous

    Marvelous dear, Hulya! I love it! Demetrios

    Liked by 2 people

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