The pain of others

For the 6.1.2014 post

 Credit to Patricia Polacco via Ken Jackson (facebook)


I had only one pregnancy, with only a slight complication. My daughter had her first child a little more than five months ago, with a complication more unsettling than mine. But in the end, we have been fortunate enough to have healthy babies who joined our lives filling them with precious love. Pregnancies of only internal interferences. Utterly welcomed ensuing births. And we both are a child of a parent or parents, defined by their irreplaceable love for us and for each of our children.

Then there was the very young Farzana Parveen, who was carrying a child as well – out of love by choice, the connector that matters most between human beings and has been time-tested again and again in different forms and extents. She, too, was the child of parents, assuming to have been brought to life also out of love. Yet, not at all as fortunate to be loved by them without condition. For her choice in marriage to and her pregnancy with Mohammad Iqbal, she was murdered by the same hands that must have at least once held her with love. And her senseless, brutal death, was – as claimed in the news – for the sake of the family’s honor.

The world-wide dilemma regarding this distorted sense of honor is not anything I want to dwell on today. I am merely trying to raise one question: What we, as co-humanity-occupants, can do in the face of such tragedies. Blame the involved society? I have. Get angry? I have. Feel sad? I have. Write about it, one pen at a time in order to raise awareness and accordingly, to inspire the will in others to react; spread the word; organize in the model of countless international organizations that exist for this or that cause; lobby to contribute to the formation of a world-wide regulation to hold accountable any society that excuses its barbarisms under the disguise of  “traditions”; …; …?

I know this issue is not solvable as easily as I have just made it sound like. Still, the idealist in me is convinced there is something to be done beyond keeping silence over such gruesome affairs destroying human lives. Even if it means to merely share a post, a link, a commentary, or a poem on electronic platform – our century’s seemingly most effective venue to reach masses across the world, I will continue to do so. I want to hope you will agree with my conviction: each of us possesses the power to mediate anything good that happens around us. To materialize such influence against the anti-thesis of good can be no exception.


honoring a mother-to-be,

another “honor” killings prey


in the hope-filled dreams for our children

we were once one – we had always been

living the privilege of a fertile womb

for eons in its rightful haven

with promise to a love-offspring

you are no longer

i met you again in your tragedy

the butchery of your blossoming life

and the one inside you to care for and adore

the internal pump on my left thus burnt at its core

the same times though in a different place

may have left intact your youthful grace

i mourn your brutally wasted self

for i wish to have been a kin to you

long lost, from afar

one who arrived in time to keep  your final breath ajar

(Draft, 5.31.2014)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

As always, I wish you a beautiful Sunday – however you may define beauty for your lives, and look very much forward to your next visit.












Filed under Poetry, Reflections

4 responses to “The pain of others

  1. Thank you Hulya…for continuing to raise awareness for “traditions” that many of us do not understand.


    • Thank you for always noting, dear Kathy. I can’t claim I, myself, understand the mentality behind these supposed “traditions” and often dismiss them as an outcome of systematic, perhaps even structured, brainwashing at a tender age. How else could a biological father kill his child…


      • How else indeed… I am overwhelmed and choked speechless, yet never surprised by the inhumanity of this creature the gods have created, and call man. In my years on this planet, I’ve come to realize that the most fearsome of animals are more human / humane than man. I’ve come to this for many of the reasons you may have read in my poems, and countless others, ever more inventive, we are exposed to each day.

        Alas an impossible malaise, man’s cruelty, thus to wipe out by they who care, and seemingly no way so far to ignite the missing wherewithal in the non-humans that develop in ever greater numbers in our inhuman world. The only hope in the long term is the continued publishing of articles such as yours, that may someday put a new generation at the helm, sufficiently disgusted with the mess the past and present generations have created, and or allowed to run rampaged, being too busy with their own comfort.


        • …”an impossible malaise”…as you conclude…as for my articles, to me, they remain so very inadequate but that fact doesn’t seem to deter me from writing them over and again…My thanks from my being’s core to you for taking the time and care to pay a visit to me with your most valuable insight. En iyi dileklerimle, Jean-Jacques!


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