Pedrito’s 30 Days with ICE.Fictional Memoir

Pedrito’s Diary, Day 3

Friday, January 24, 2025

I couldn’t move my eyes away from the growing distance between Gabriela and me. One man was dragging her. She must have felt paralyzed in her fear and sadness. I couldn’t stop crying and begging, “Please let me stay with my sister. She is only 4.”

The tall man who was pushing me nonstop, shouted: “Stop crying! Move!”

After several minutes passed, we arrived in front of a building that looked like an airplane hangar. I remembered how Papa made paper airplanes for me. “Pedrito, you love planes so much. Maybe one day, you will become an aircraft pilot.” He had also made a hangar for my paper planes. It was a shoe box with one of the short sides cut open.

The hangar in front of me was gigantic. There was an entry gate where several men in uniform stood, their rifles on their side. I had never seen a gun or a rifle before. The men were very tall and hefty, and so scary with their rifles clutched by one of their hands. One of them signaled with his other hand to the man behind me, “proceed.” I was pushed through the guarded gate, then, shoved inside.

I am good with numbers, as Papa and my teacher always told me. I couldn’t possibly guess the number of children in the hangar. Some looked Gabriela’s age, some seemed to be my age. Others must have been teenagers. They were quite tall. Taller than me, for sure. What all of them seemed to have in common was their loud cries. I didn’t need to hide my heavy crying anymore.

I looked around to see if I could stand close to a boy of my age. It was difficult to move, as we all stood shoulder to shoulder. Then I heard a baby’s cries from close by. I stood on my toes to see better. The baby was in the arms of someone in uniform.

I remembered Gabriela as a baby. When I was 4 years old, Mama’s tummy grew. And it kept growing. Mama sat me aside one day, hugged and kissed me, and then said: “My sweet, darling Pedrito, I want to tell you something. There is a baby inside me. She will be there until one day when she comes out from my tummy to be with our family. Now, she will be very, very little. She will cry sometimes. When she is hungry, thirsty, or wet. But she will also sleep a lot. To grow. And you will get to know her every day. You will always be her big brother.” I was so excited to hear Mama’s words. A big brother! I could hardly wait to meet my little sister. Quite a while later, Mama came home with a bundle. Papa had stayed home with me. He rushed to the hallway and hugged Mom and gave a gentle kiss to the baby in her arms. “Come here, Pedrito, meet your little sister, Gabriela.”

Oh yes, I remembered Gabriela as a baby. My beautiful little sister with huge brown eyes. What is she doing now, I wondered. How is she now, I asked myself. And my tears began to flood down my face.

© hülya n. yılmaz, February 1, 2025