onto death, I want to lay the self
my One and Only’s hope eyes erase the bed
before the head makes contact
onto death, I want to lay the self
deadlock is all I feel
what have I become?
what, though, had I been?
the husband…former already?
weary, distraught, ruined
my One and Only’s sun face takes a shadow now and again
it all began with her inside me
love took off to eternity with her every smile
my only precious bond to life
for whom I pushed aside the self
not one small regret
the one for whose hope death does not get me today
I made us a home, I glorified it
on my own for long, too long of many years
filling in for all marital lack: a promise is a promise after all!
years left, tens of years passed away
multiplied into trying decades
once looked aback, there exists a husband…
my One and Only’s sun face takes a shadow now and again
her graceful, not yet disheartened soul wound up
on the verge of a leap onto her own life
but…how about…
no, no, not possible!
once my One and Only is no longer home
having set onto her own path
the husband and I…
ways of ours ever so apart
how long, until where?
if the self can remain as self, that is!
onto death, I want to lay the self
my One and Only’s hope eyes erase the bed
before the head makes contact
onto death, I want to lay the self
deadlock is all I feel
what have I become?
what, though, had I been?
hülyaswritings 
[From dear Thomas Fitzgerald, a fellow writer, from a different site…] Thank you once again, Thomas!
“onto death, I want to lay the self
deadlock is all I feel
what have I become?
what, though, had I been?”
One might find himself thinking about the exestential realities we all must face, is it a mere mid-life crisis of morality, or indeed just wimsy! who knows, maybe it’s both, well done, good read.
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[From a fellow writer from a different site…]
A lot of hidden life in this poem. I like the way you led the reader into thoughts and into action with the short statements.
“onto death, I want to lay the self
my One and Only’s hope eyes erase the bed
before the head makes contact”
I enjoy poetry that made me think and ponder life. The poem did. Thank you for the outstanding poem.
Coyote
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